3 Ways to Get Unstuck, No Matter How You Got There

pano

My world was rocked by our recent trip to Africa.

It was a combination of the elephants, rhinos, hippos, zebras, warthogs, etc… that were just in feet from us, and the connections we made with some exceptional human beings both big and small.

Memories and experiences we will never forget. You can find the Kenya 2016 album on my personal Facebook page.

The small humans that had such an impact on us were the kids from my father’s project hannehowardfund.org.  These kids have all grown up in a Nairobi slum, an environment that is hard to imagine until you physically see one, some are orphans, yet in spite of their realities these children were humbling.

They are hard working, welcoming, grateful, strong, joyous and fun. These kids penetrated my heart.

They have the same dreams and aspirations as our kids, but didn’t have the great fortune of being born in a country like ours.

It’s a combination of all of the above that left me feeling stuck. Questioning “What am I doing with my life?”

No matter what causes these feelings, I know I am not alone.

Feeling like we are spinning our wheels, questioning ourselves…. feeling stuck.

Here are 3 Steps to Move Past Stuck:

1. Talk about it.

Sometimes we can’t figure it out alone. It may sound cliché but talking about it helped me so much.  Find a friend or three or four, who will listen, without judgment and just share.  I found that even hearing myself say things out loud was helpful, let alone hearing another person’s perspectives.

2. See the bigger picture:

It’s literally about lifting ourselves out from only focusing on the moment. Choosing to see the larger picture and how things fit together helped me gain a perspective I was blind to earlier on.  It’s like I was only focusing on the 2 missing pieces of my rich and beautiful 1,000 piece puzzle.

3. Be ok with it, because this too shall pass:

A wise friend shared a metaphor that really resonated about being an explorer.

That you have to trust in the direction you are heading, accepting that it’s never a straight line. Sometimes it’s smooth sailing and other times there are stormy seas that literally knock you over.  No matter what the conditions, you just can’t give up.  If you do, you’ll never get there.  If you turn back, you’ll never know.

So needless to say, the combination of these three has brought me back.

No longer feeling stuck.

The irony, is that none of the details around me changed, just how I chose to navigate them that did.

The same will hold for you.

 

Session Update:

I’m am hosting a 5 week, virtual, P.O.W.E.R Toolkit program for women who know that they need to create change. Women who are done doing the same thing and expecting a different outcome.

This TOOLKIT program is for you if:

  • You would benefit from being held accountable to create the change at work or in life that you know you’ve been thinking about.
  • You are ready to learn how to replace the limiting habits that are keep you stuck with ones that enable you to thrive.
  • Connect with other like-minded women and leverage their perspectives.

Details:

  • Start date: March 22nd.
  • Every Tuesday from 12-1 EST.
  • Investment $200
  • Here’s the LINK for more information
  • Email me with any questions victoria@yourpoweroutlet.com

 

3 Blind Spots that Limit Your Success

I would never have agreed that I was playing it safe or small.

I would have pushed back, knowing that I was doing my best. Working hard and being really intentional at work and in life.

Despite the fact that I’ve always taken action, expanded my comfort zone, I can now see and own that I was still playing it safe.

I was standing in my own way, unaware of my own blind spots.

BLACK.dot.text

Continue reading

Self-Imposed Limits: 3 Ways to Push Past Them

See.Believe.Achieve   – John Maclean

This mantra is so simple, yet was so profound.

My husband and I recently attended a Young Presidents Organization (YPO) conference in Vancouver, Canada. The entire 3 day conference was exceptional, but there was one INSANE moment that I want to share with you.

I will never forget the Saturday when we were introduced to John Maclean.

Continue reading

3 Questions to Minimize Your Fear and Take Action

I did it.

I faced my fear.

Yes, it’s my job to help professional women to Get Out of Their Own Way….and I too have to practice what I preach.

I was sitting on the ledge.  Wanting to go into unchartered territories…but avoiding.  I have a goal of launching P.O.W.E.R Advisory Boards within corporations.  An opportunity for professional women, across business units, to connect and learn from each other’s experiences.

To stop trying to figure it out alone. 

I know that shared experiences decrease learning curves and increase results. But most importantly, they create the opportunity for women to expand their networks, authentically, with other like-minded, ambitious women, who want to thrive as a whole, at work and in life.

Despite the fact that I know how impactful, effective and helpful this is, I wasn’t taking action.  I was scared.

Fear.Sept.9.2014 Continue reading

3 Steps to A New Beginning

September feels like a new beginning. I know I am not alone.

Between my friends and clients it is amazing how many have shared the same.

Sometimes our new beginnings are FORCED, like my client who was told she has to look for another job.

Other times, it’s a CHOICE, like for my friend who has chosen to quit the job she hated…
And then there’s everything in between from divorce to moving cities, etc.

For me, my new beginning stems from the fact that I chose to unplug and totally disconnect from work over the summer. There were so many benefits and I feel very grateful to have done it, however it does come at a cost.

My calendar feels less than stellar and it’s time for me to re-focus to make sure that one year from now, I don’t look back and feel that I’m still in the same spot.

Even if you don’t have a new beginning “happening”, you can Choose for September to be an intentional starting point.

Here are three things I am going to do and you can too:

#1 STOP AND GET CLEAR.
This is where we get clarity about what we want to transpire between now and 6, 10, 12 months from now, or whatever time frame works for you.

You can even start by asking yourself:

“What do I want more of?” and “What do I want less of?”

Then get SPECIFIC about your goals.
I find that with a plan, I feel like I am in the driver’s seat, vs having my wheels spinning and not making any traction.

#2 TAKE ACTION.
Enough said.
A tactic is to schedule your activity. Put your priorities into your calendar to make time for them.

#3 BE GRATEFUL
This summer I was introduced to a really simple concept that resonated with me.

The concept comes from a man who I had never heard of prior to watching his video. His name is Vishen Lakhiani of www.mindvalley.com. He shares how his business and life thrive and prosper when he’s in FLOW.

Which in concept is a balance between being:

GRATEFUL AND HAPPY FOR TODAY       AND       HAVING A CLEAR VISION OF WHERE YOU ARE GOING

I know that I often get stuck and focus on what I have yet to achieve or the gap between where I am vs where I want to be, or what I’m not doing.

I know it’s not helpful.

It impacts my ability to enjoy the moment and be happy for what I have created and have in my life.

I know that feeling happy propels me at work and in life to do better.
So, being in FLOW is my new Choice.

I invite you to follow these 3 steps and create your purposeful beginning too.

 

2 Tips To Make Your Summer Count

The school year has just ended, or is about to, for many of us. The kids are excited….but I can’t necessarily say the same for their parents.

As a working mother, in the past I have felt very challenged by the summer months. Trying to juggle my career ambitions and goals, with the desire to be a present and engaged mom.

ARGH!

No matter if you are a parent, or not, you can use this post to set your intentions for the next few months, to help make your summer months count.

Continue reading

Permission to Stop Giving

I was recently ‘stood up’, by a no-show, despite the fact that I had carved time out my schedule to give to someone for free.

I was annoyed.

I was giving my time away because I felt I SHOULD and it wasn’t received or valued.

MY BAD.

I have realized that for me there’s a clear distinction between giving something away that I WANT to, and giving something away I feel I HAVE to or SHOULD.

The no-show was MY reminder that it’s up to me to start creating my own boundaries for what I WANT to be giving away.

I know I’m not alone.

Continue reading

4 Tips to Stop Minimizing What You Have to Say

The topic of low self-confidence has been on my radar recently and its impact on our ability to reach our goals.

Projecting low self-confidence isn’t only reserved for those who have internal self-doubt.

What I am noticing is that low self-confidence is also being unintentionally projected even by those who feel more self-assured.

Continue reading

The guilt trap

 

In most of the workshops I host, when professional women talk about their lives and the need to prioritize and make decisions, the word ‘guilt’ always comes up.   Especially when talking about trying to juggle everything that’s important to us.

What’s incredible is the power that guilt can have over someone.

Guilt comes in all shapes and sizes.  Guilt of working too hard, not spending enough time at home, not spending enough time with their partners or parents, doing too little for family, for school, and on and on….

I get it.  I too feel guilty sometimes.

Luckily, I now know guilt is a choice and that it doesn’t help me, it just traps me.

Continue reading

Internalizing Feedback – 3 Tips to Stop

Over the past few weeks I have been facilitating many workshops for TD Bank’s female entrepreneurial clients. Guiding these women through a strategic goal setting approach to help them get really clear about what is important to them at work and in life, and then creating a plan to make them happen… while expanding their networks with like-minded women. I love this work!

The workshop is designed to give the participants a lot of opportunities to share experiences, think strategically, plan and connect.

The energy in the room is vibrant, there’s lots of talking and as participants leave, I hear wonderful feedback.

Then there are the feedback forms.

As I was about to go through forms from the first workshop I literally found myself holding my breath before looking at the sheets.

For some reason I was nervous.

Nervous about uncovering someone didn’t derive tremendous value for the time they invested or didn’t have the same experience that I had intended for them or that they didn’t like my facilitation style, etc…

Nervous I was going to hear something negative.

Luckily I now know ways to get over myself and wanted to share 3 Tips so you can too:

Continue reading