I just hosted a fun night of Shopping for a Cause. It accomplished two of my favourite things of this season: connecting with friends and giving to others with a % of the proceeds supporting my father’s not-for-profit.
During the night as I was chatting with friends, I found myself repeating the comment “You can teach old dogs new tricks”.
I am proof, but even more so….
So often we hold ourselves back from taking action, that’s outside of our comfort zone, because of fear.
Paralyzed by a NHO “Negative Hypothetical Outcome” that of course we want to avoid.
But truthfully, we have no idea what the outcome will be until we try, yet we are committed to the fact that it’s going to be negative.
So….let’s go there…
Today I wanted to quit.
I didn’t say anything out loud to my friend and running partner, but I was struggling to keep up and labouring.
After we parted ways, I stopped to catch my breath and as I walked the block back home I realized how many parallels there are between running, work and life.
Recently, I was listening to CBC’s Gill Deacon asking listeners to share what they were most grateful for over the past week.
One listener’s response prompted this post by sharing: “The last 3 minutes it took to think about all the things I am grateful for.”
We all have something to be grateful for, no matter how crazy your life is or how awful a situation sometimes feels.
I can remember when our two week old was in the hospital for a month. At the beginning of the journey we weren’t sure what was going on. It was a scary and crazy time but our choice was to focus on the fact that we were so grateful to have access to amazing doctors and facilities.
It was a choice.
Gratitude is an antidote for so many things.
As ambitious women, with full plates, so often we are goal centric.
Becoming hyper focused on our goals and delaying our happiness until the outcomes are achieved and/or missing out on so many other things transpiring around us while we push forward.
Ironically by doing this I bet that either one or both are impacting what’s most important to you.
I was recently speaking with a client who reminded me of how debilitating “What if” can be.
The anticipated negative outcomes that we spend too much time thinking about and that lead to inaction.
What if they don’t like it….
What if I fail…
What if I don’t land the client…
It makes sense.
None of these ‘what ifs’ are remotely appealing so why would we even bother to take any action when the anticipated outcome is so negative.
The truth is the outcomes are unknown and we have NO idea…
I recently had a conversation with a friend who was wrongfully dismissed from her job.
Retrospectively she can now see how her boss had been planning her demise for the past 6 months.
No matter if it’s a boss, colleague, family member, neighbour, etc… difficult people are all around.
In the past few weeks I have been hearing from women who are feeling totally stuck.
Being at a point in their careers and lives where they have to make a big decision to take a course, to go for the promotion, etc… that impact not only them.
These women are ambitious and want to have exceptional careers and lives, and these decisions were being viewed as at the expense of their families.
Every day I am amazed by the number of incredible, competent, intelligent and driven women who share with me the fact that they question themselves.
Do you ever find yourself:
Second guessing if you are good enough?
Worried that someone is going to realize you aren’t as smart as they thought you were?
Worrying that somebody is going to discover your dirty little secret?
Fearful that you won’t live up to people’s expectations?
I recently went through a low period.
We all do. We are all human.
I had just come off of my high after completing a road show, hosting workshops for female entrepreneurs in cities across western Canada. When I came back, I was accessing my landscape and felt defeated and frustrated by a few things.
The details are irrelevant because what brings me down will be different from you, but I know that you too experience struggle.
The point is, we all experience setbacks. Trying times.