Over the past week I have been reminded of how hesitant so many women are to ASK FOR WHAT we WANT.
Have you ever found yourself in front of an opportunity, a perspective client thinking, etc…thinking: “I want this”, “I know I can help them”, “They are exactly who I’d love to work with”, etc… but you don’t take advantage of the opportunity?
What stops you?
What has stopped me in the past is a fear of being perceived a certain way. I know I am not alone, I hear it from so many others. A fear of people thinking they are pushy, greedy, desperate, arrogant, cheezy, etc…
If none of these are yours, fill in the blanks “I don’t want them to think I’m ……”
Fair enough. I totally get it. Why would we ever want to subject ourselves to being interpreted ‘that’ way.
Despite the facts that I do this for a living, I sometimes find myself in that negative, default thought. But now I know I can choose a different way of looking at the scenario, and that’s what I wanted to share.
Here are my 2 cents.
- It’s SO far from our Truth.
Have you ever thought about the fact that being ‘that way’ is SO far from our personality, we’d have to make an extra special effort to become ‘that’ person?
Think of it this way. It’s like going into a gym and not wanting to lift weights because you don’t want to have muscles like a body builder.
Guess what…..it takes SO much effort to look like a body builder that we’d have to work REALLY hard, but if we leaned into it a little, we’d definitely benefit from doing something we’ve shied away from in the past.
Plus there’s so much potential upside.
- It’s a DISSERVICE not to ask.
My bet is that if you are reading this post, you are a thoughtful, conscientious person, who is committed to doing their best at work and in life.
Your current perspective about ‘asking for what you need’ is negative, and that’s what’s stopping you.
The irony is that we are making it up. We truly have no idea how we will be interpreted, but for some reason we make up outcomes/stories that aren’t in our favour. Why do we do that to ourselves!
So here’s a chance to change your story and perspective.
Call it the TRUST perspective.
Answer these sentences:
- At work, I know and trust that I am…………………………..
- By offering what I do, I am…………………………
- The worst thing that can happen to me is……………
OR If they say no, it’s not personal
You can even write it down or have it printed beside your desk to remind you to just ASK. You have nothing to loose and so much to gain.
Every time we shy away from making an Ask, we CHOOSE to limit ourselves. We stand in our own way.
The next time an opportunity presents to Ask for what you want, I dare you to TRUST and DO IT!
We’d all love to hear what happens! You can leave a message in our Facebook community https://www.facebook.com/turner.coaching.9 or post below.
Here’s MY ASK. I would love to give you, or other women that you know, the opportunity to unplug and reboot over a delicious lunch, and connect with amazing women who too are ready to get really clear on what it is they want in work and life, so these priorities become their focus and results. You can reserve your seat here: http://bit.ly/1mkNGqU
Please share this link with your Toronto based community of professional women. I’d love to meet them and give them an opportunity to Reboot! http://bit.ly/1mkNGqU