My 3 Lessons from Death

You’ll notice that I have been radio silent since my last post and this is why.

2014 began with a huge loss.  My mother’s identical twin sister, who I am named after, passed away.  She fought the most graceful and inspiring battle with stage 4 cancer for the past 5 years.

She was a miracle.

Vicki was supposed to have died long ago, but her will to live, her spirit and her ability to choose the thoughts that entered her mind (so that she NEVER spent time on the negative), were all part of what kept her here with us.

My aunt and my mother are my role models.  I have learnt so much about how and who I want to be in this world, as much as the exact opposite. How and who I don’t want to be.

Literally, these two incredible women are at the root of everything I do and all that I am.  For that I am grateful.

What I wanted to share are my 3 Lessons from Death. They can relate to all aspects of your life, at work and in your home.

1.  Perspective is Everything: 

We all get to choose how we see and respond to things, events, tragedies, etc…. There is so much to be gained from choosing to reframe. The ability to see the silver lining or the gifts in the moment. It’s not about negating your feelings because it’s important to  process whatever it is that you are feeling. But then you get to choose what you want to focus on that will help you to move forward.

2.  You’ll NEVER Regret Being Present:

My goals and ambitions were wiped off of my radar when we were all called back to Nova Scotia, early Dec,  because Vic’s health had taken a sudden turn.  From that day forward, it was my family who all rallied to provide the 24/7 care Vic needed to keep her in her home.  I’m so grateful that the decision to be present was choiceless.   My wish for you is to learn from my experiences. Don’t wait for a life or death situation to choose to be present.  Work will always be there.

3.  Gratitude Heals:

It’s truly amazing what gratitude has done for me and my family.  When you are focusing on what you have in your life, you aren’t focusing on what you don’t.  Every night before I fall asleep, I recall 3 things that I am grateful for from that day.  Combing through the memories of my day, also allows me to take stock of so many other aspects of the day I probably would never have thought of again.

What’s wonderful about this journey with Vic is that my heart is not heavy.  I am not burdened by constant sadness. I am more filled with relief for her and gratitude for how everything has transpired.

With Gratitude,


2 thoughts on “My 3 Lessons from Death

  1. Well said, Victoria. I know how much your aunt meant to you and what a loss this is to you and your family. You are handling her death with such grace, as I am only sure she would want you to. xo.

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